No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
