Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
