I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
