Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Kiss

  (1-313): View more from Michigan

  Puke

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): Kiss (1-313): Puke http://tfl.nu/qokk
  Replies (6) Good night (1018) Bad night (1940)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater. http://tfl.nu/r4ec
  Replies (9) Good night (4473) Bad night (688)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): my new favorite insult= "thundercunt" http://tfl.nu/7c82
  Replies (48) Good night (4154) Bad night (652)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.

  (1-714): View more from California

  yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen. (1-714): yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed... http://tfl.nu/69pu
  Replies (91) Good night (1028) Bad night (2564)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.

  (1-970): View more from Colorado

  you better fuck at least one or both of them.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes. (1-970): you better fuck at least one or both of them. http://tfl.nu/eeo0
  Replies (12) Good night (5055) Bad night (790)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary. http://tfl.nu/11rw
  Replies (15) Good night (3695) Bad night (989)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in. http://tfl.nu/8v36
  Replies (11) Good night (1463) Bad night (2737)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't." http://tfl.nu/2qab
  Replies (3) Good night (1826) Bad night (611)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county. http://tfl.nu/h5dk
  Replies (12) Good night (1377) Bad night (679)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it. http://tfl.nu/ir5l
  Replies (4) Good night (1224) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness http://tfl.nu/w2dw
  Replies (2) Good night (1276) Bad night (931)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave. http://tfl.nu/74ql
  Replies (3) Good night (621) Bad night (1164)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people http://tfl.nu/kwkh
  Replies (2) Good night (472) Bad night (686)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country http://tfl.nu/207x
  Replies (0) Good night (507) Bad night (229)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum. http://tfl.nu/2wyb
  Replies (1) Good night (543) Bad night (204)

Randomize