dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
