well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize