ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
It's rum buckets o'clock
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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