The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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