nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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