what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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