told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
The Olympian is in my bed
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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