Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
