there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
