Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
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