Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
