I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Also, beer. Big fan.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
