smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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