chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.