After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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