i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
