Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
