who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
