You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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