So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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