I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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