i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
