Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
