There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
