Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
