its not stalking. its research.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
