Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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