You can't special order awesome
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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