I have demons in me.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
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