smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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