Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
