I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize