epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
