My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I just forgot I was standing up.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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