Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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