So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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