You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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