My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
