This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Text me some of your sweat
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize