I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
