Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(502): View more from Kentucky

She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.

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(630): View more from Illinois

My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.

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(417): View more from Missouri

Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?

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(254): View more from Texas

she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.

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(206): View more from Washington

I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.

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(616): View more from Michigan

Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds

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(334): View more from Alabama

Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?

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(407): View more from Florida

Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.

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