She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
