Kiss
Puke
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
