Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize