Don't you send me to vm
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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