I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I smell like Dick and happiness
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
