I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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