Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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